Tag Archives: movies

Watchmen: Tales of the Black Freighter

Netflix delivered my copy of “Watchmen: Tales of the Black Freighter” earlier today… I liked it about as much as I liked the comic version. Its well written and the arts good it just doesn’t do anything for me personally… You know like midget porn. I can understand why its erotic I just can’t get a hard-on from it… So if you like midget po… I mean tales of the black freighter you’ll like the animated version.

Also included on the disk was a 60 minutes version of Under The Hood which was all sorts of awesome. Between all the shots of the actors who played the minutemen characters and the fact that Hollis and the newspaper man got a bunch of screen time it was all sorts good.

Finally Watched The Watchmen

Okay so just saw the movie. Probably a couple spoilers ahead but I mean comeon the books been out for 20+ years now…

First off the Penis was a let down. The way the internet is buzzing I thought John spun it around like a windmill or skullfucked a nun with it. I mean come on it wasn’t even that big! Honestly though its the first time I felt the majority of the internet was being sorta juvenile…

Oh My God Penis!

Oh My God Penis!

Second Off…
Violence wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be compared to all the bitching I heard on the goddamn internet again. Sure that scene where Manhattan implodes the gangster and you see him on the ceiling got me for a second but otherwise.. Ehh
Third off…
Way to much bitching about the male nudity in general and not enough talking about Malin Akerman’s kickass tittays…

From a comic adaptation point of view I thought they did a pretty kickass job of it. Loved all the little background details though I’m a little bummed they didn’t show the full Burgers & Borsch sign at the end.
They did a pretty good job of making an entertaining 3 hour movie without unduly fucking with the plot.
I can understand why they took the squid out and set us up the bombs. It would have worked if theyd focused more on the missing peoples sub-plot but eh. I sorta like this version since it makes Ozy look a wee bit more thoughtful in his planning instead of deciding to drop a fucking squid in Manhattan.

Finally I thought the casting was pretty kickass all the way around though I wish Rorschach didn’t sound so much like the Goddamned batman of Christian Bale fame. Also thought Jefferey Morgan was all sorts of awesome as the Comedian and I wished he had more screen time though I also thought the same thing when reading the comic so ehh.

I leave you with this image to ponder over

malinwatchmen2